Friday, May 4, 2012

A week of failure....

*We haven't had clean towels in this house all week.
*I forgot to give Novenah her medicine AGAIN.
*I bought takeout this week in spite of the fact that my freezer held 4 casseroles.
*"Am I failing my kids in homeschooling" is a CONSTANT question I ask myself...this week the answer seems to be "yes" as an EPIC fail in swim both reminded me WHY I homeschool while at the SAME TIME making me feel like I'm not doing a good enough job at homeschooling.
*The counter has had dirty dishes on it all week.
*I'm sick and exhausted and NOT getting enough sleep.
*and a MYRIAD of other tiny little failures...

This week has been FULL of situations that have left me feeling "less than." I remember once at a teachers' convention many years ago, listening to someone say that it takes 10 positive comments to make up for just 1 negative comment. Well this week I need about 1K positive comments to outweigh all the negative I have "heard."

If I'm being fair, I suppose there have been PLENTY of good things too:

*Had my yearly review this week. My boss basically told me I'm fabulous. She doesn't know what she'd do without me.
*The kids have FINALLY almost finished Alice in Wonderland and Elijah VOLUNTARILY took on his first chapter book this week (Black Beauty)
*No one in this house went without food, love and care this week.
*The house didn't burn down.
*The car didn't break down.
*The world didn't cease to rotate.

Yet the negative things scream SO MUCH LOUDER! You're not good enough, Jami! You're not doing enough, Jami! You could be better, Jami! I hear these messages so much more clearly than: Your kids love Jesus, Jami! Your a fabulous reference checker, Jami! Your caring for MANY people with LOVE, Jami!

I'm not sure what the lesson of this blog is. I want it to be something positive.  Maybe it is found in this excerpt from the letter I wrote to my brother who is away at basic training right now:

I imagine you are called names a bit in basic training huh??? You just remember the names God calls you, Seth!  Precious! Chosen! The apple of His eye! Worth dying for! Be encouraged for what you are doing is building a GREAT future for yourself!
When I have a week of failure... When the accusations and failings are SCREAMING at me.... maybe I just need to remind myself:


PRECIOUS!
CHOSEN!
THE APPLE OF HIS EYE!
WORTH DYING FOR!

Hope your week has been better than mine.  If it hasn't, just remind yourself:

PRECIOUS!
CHOSEN!
THE APPLE OF HIS EYE!
WORTH DYING FOR!


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