Sunday, July 25, 2010

I *heart* my blog readers!

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
I Thessalonians 5:11

WOW! Thank you ALL so much! I got a ton of encouragement from yesterday's comments/replies. (Oh and aren't the reaction buttons FUN?!?!?!) It was so good to hear that my "debasement" encourages people. If what I am going through ministers to just ONE person, then I consider the humiliation of laying it all out there, WELL worth it! So on I share... get ready because the roller coaster ride continues:

About an hour after I posted my blog yesterday, John returned home in the minivan. I rushed out to greet him and said, "Show me those brake lights, baby!" I saw no lights. My stomach fell a little. I asked, "Are you pressing the brake?" He confirmed he was. "Ummmmm nothing is happening." I said feeling a little sick. "Try the blinker." Nope! Nada! "Are the headlights on?" They were. No taillights either.

So our little problem was NOT actually fixed. Joy! Joy! We called the repair shop (which keep in mind had our Buick in its lot waiting to be looked at), and our friend Stevie apologized profusely. He promised that HE would be the one to work on the van this time, and he would figure out what the problem was, and he agreed to pick it up from our house on Monday because we NOW are actually carless. He also agreed to try to get a look at the Buick right away so we could at least have one car back.

A recheck of the van indicated that we actually had taillights and brake lights, IF we were not using the blinkers, but once the blinker was used, the taillights and brake lights were gone. So we decided to jet to Franklin and borrow my parents truck so John would be able to get to and from work. I tried hard not to use the blinker the whole way.

So here we are. We have NO working vehicle. We have borrowed my parents truck (not sure how long we can use it though), and John can get to and from work, but we still have not heard anything about the Buick and the minivan's problem remains undiagnosed. Wanna know the weird thing? I'm not scared. Really! I promise you. I'm not! I'm not discouraged. I keep pinching myself thinking maybe I'm asleep or something, but I'm not discouraged at all. Wanna know the weirdest thing? I'm kinda excited and happy. Now before you call social services to come get my children because they are being cared for by an insane woman, PLEASE let me explain.

I'm excited because I am EXPECTING something HUGE from God. I really am. I am expecting a HUMDINGER to WOW the world on this one. That's part of why I rushed down here to blog about this today. See if the miracle happens BEFORE I get to put the crazy, DIRE, need-the-red-sea-parted situation out there, then it will lose a little of it's SHEBANG! when I finally tell it. I wanted you to hear the situation, to feel the need, and to have a chance to be a part of the MIRACLE! Pray right this instant. STOP your reading and PRAY that God takes care of the Kastner's transportation situation. Because I promise you with ALL of me, if you pray you WILL see that prayer answered and you WILL be part of a miracle. I know with all of me the Kastners will see miracles through this. We already have seen one: while carless, John is still driving to and from work thanks to a loaner car from his generous in-laws. So QUICK pray so you can be a part of the next miracle which is coming.

I'm also happy. I swear I'm not just working hard to find good in a bad situation. I am really, truly giddy happy over this. John gets to drive the truck! Even if it is for only just a few days, he has been reunited with a past love, and it is AWESOME for him. In case you don't know, the truck used to be ours, but desperate finances caused for desperate measures, and we handed the truck back over to my parents. That truck was the NICEST vehicle John has ever "owned" (granted the bank owned it and we were making payments to them for it... but you get what I'm saying right?) My husband is not a proud man. He GRATEFULLY drives a 1990"ish" Buick LeSabre, with no a/c (and no longer any blower motor even), with a driver's seat which is stuck in recline, with a driver's side window that doesn't roll down, and with a "Don't let the car fool you, my treasure is in heaven" bumper sticker. He thanks God for the little beater every day because it CONTINUES to get him to and from work, and because it was a MIRACLE from Heaven as our Pastor and his wife GAVE it to us for FREE. So I know that I know that I know that he would never speak an ill word of his precious little beater Buick, and that he is not too proud to drive it. However, I also know that he is LOVING driving that truck again. In his heart, that baby will always be "his" and while he doesn't love it more than Jesus or me or his children... no matter who "owns" it he will ALWAYS love that thing with a deep and abiding love. So I am HAPPY that in the midst of this trying time, with his neck still throbbing from his recent setback and with the stress of having not one but TWO vehicles in the shop, that he is at least able to have a LITTLE bit of comfort from being reunited with his love truck.

So where's the lesson Jami? Well... this morning I was reading James 1 and something hit me. Now I have memorized the ENTIRE book of James (with my sixth graders in 1996... are you one of them? shout out and say you memorized it for me!) so I KNOW this verse. However, this morning it hit me in a different way.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,
James 1:2

PURE joy it says. PURE!!!! I thought about the word "pure" for a little bit. I thought about the fact that one tiny little speck can make something "impure." So PURE joy conjures up the idea of NOT ONE SPECK of worry, fear, doubt, anger. NOTHING but JOY when you face a trial. I do not know if my joy right now is pure, but I do know that it is the closest thing to pure it has ever been. I keep thinking, "Shouldn't I be stressing about this?" The thought will flit through my head, "Shouldn't my tummy be in at least a little bit of knots?" I almost feel guilty like shouldn't I at least have a "healthy" amount fear about this situation? But I don't. Am I a little inconvenienced because of it? Sure! I forgot to get coffee yesterday at Wal-Mart so I am drinking my LAST cup of coffee this morning. However, once again I am unable to drive even to Mayville to get some. Am I a little disappointed because of this situation? Sure! We missed out on a lake party John's boss was having yesterday. Not only had I prepared TWO dishes to bring along, but the kids had been wearing life jackets ALL day in anticipation of the event and then we couldn't go. Do I wish a little for the easy way out? Sure! I would find it GREAT if I looked out my window to find God had dropped a BRAND new fuel-efficient, 4-wheel drive vehicle which seats 7 on my driveway. He could even put a pretty red bow on top for effect. But in spite of all these feelings there is no worry, no fear, no anger. I am excited in anticipating the resolution of this matter and I am happy that John gets a little time to re-kindle his love for his "baby" (a pretty black Chevy truck).

So maybe that is my lesson today.... PURE joy. Not just searching for good in the bad, but really truly just having JOY
*JOY that we were considered worthy to be used as God's billboard again
*JOY that we were chosen to be the recipients of another miracle of God (for what else is it but a miracle when you are driving to work but you don't have a working vehicle???)
*JOY that we are poised to be the recipients of another miracle (for He did NOT bring us out this far to take us back again!)
*JOY that John gets to drive the truck again
*JOY that no matter what He has us in His capable hands.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,
James 1:2

[One quick prayer request: Tomorrow John is having a neuro cognitive test done to establish a base line so the doctor can track if his memory issues are a result of a nerological problem. It is an eight hour test! PLEASE pray for him.]

1 comment:

  1. I know that verse from James VERY well. I, too, am having transportation "issues". A little background is when I got pregnant with youngest daughter (she's 5 now) my car (only 3 yrs old and was the newest vehicle I had ever "owned") was repossessed b/c I couldn't afford to make the payments. I went 3 years without a car. Talk about a humbling experience! My mom bought a new car and gave me her old one. A 1995 Lincoln Town Car. The car was a lemon. But I was SO thankful to have it. It was an answered prayer for me! The car has over 180,000 miles on it, the paint is faded and peeling in some spots, the two front windows do not roll down, the two back windows only go down half way, no ac (the heat didn't work for the first two years I had it), needs brakes, needs tires, is a gas hog, and I'm starting to have trouble with the key getting stuck in the ignition. But you know what? I'm so thankful for the car! I keep praying and believing for God to open a door for a job so I can get a newer car, but in the meantime, I'm going to praise Him. The way I see it I don't have much in comparison to others, but I feel blessed because I have more than most. I know God is in control. I will continue to pray for you and can't wait to hear about your miracle! Maybe God will decide to do a "buy one get one" for us?!

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