"Thou shalt not bear false witness..." Exodus 20:16
Honesty.... It is a good idea to be honest, because God commands us to be. It is also a good idea, because it is difficult for people to trust us if we are not honest. So we all agree.... It is GOOD to be honest.
I've never really had a problem with honesty. As long as I can remember I have been a TERRIBLE liar. My mom loves to tell the story of how when I was about fourteen or so she picked me up from a party. I got in the backseat and started WIGGING out. I told her I had done something really bad. She was freaking out! "Is she pregnant? Does she smoke pot? Did she knock over a liquor store?" These thoughts were racing through her brain. Nopes! I was at a party where there was drinking and smoking, and I had a beer and a few puffs on a cigarette. I freaked out and fessed up the second I saw my momma. She was SO relieved because it was just one beer and a few puffs of a cigarette! So as you see lying has never really been a problem for this girl. I couldn't lie well to save my life.
But the Bible also commands us:
"...instead speaking the truth in love," Ephesians 4:15
God wants us to put on love above all things... to be kind and gentle, and I am VERY good at filtering my comments through the love of Christ. Therefore I EXCEL at the "in love" portion of this command, but sometimes at the expense of the "speaking the truth" part.
See sometimes the truth is ugly and nasty and not kind or gentle. Sometimes the truth of how we feel or how we see something is COMPLETELY changed when covered over with love. Sometimes the things I feel in my heart pass through the filter of Christ's love and upon exiting look NOTHING as they looked upon entering the filter. I used to always see this as good, assuming it showed that I had self-control in this area and was able to deny my sinful urges. But lately I'm not so sure.
Being so good at employing a filter has made it VERY difficult for me to not only say what I am really feeling, but even sometimes to even KNOW what I'm really feeling. Recently John challenged me with this thought, "Are you being honest when you have such an EXTREME filter in place?" I don't know.
Also I have recently realized that when I feel an icky feeling and process it through the filter of Christ's love, the icky part goes somewhere too. It's like the filter of Christ's love has this refuse container.... Have you ever used a juicer? You know you put a piece a fruit in and fresh juice comes spurting out? Well, opposite the side that's squirting out fresh juice is a side that is shooting out the skin and flesh and seeds and all the part of the fruit that is NOT juice. It is the refuse container. This past year I have had so many things pass through my filter of Christ's love that it is almost broken because the refuse container is OVERFLOWING!
So that's my dilemma and actually writing through it really hasn't gotten me towards any clarification. Speaking the truth in love.... obviously both the truth and the love parts are important or God wouldn't have commanded it this way.
***But how do we know how much truth and how much love is right in the equation?
***AND by adding a little love to dilute the truth have we made it less true???
***FINALLY, what do I do with this overflowing refuse container? how do I empty it out?
I don't know, and I would LOVE it if you would all comment and give me your thoughts on this. Let the teacher become the student... or the blogger become the reader, because I need INPUT this time for I haven't worked through it on my own!
