Day 7... My final thoughts

So sorry I left you all hanging on the wrap up to the soul cleanse thing. It has been an INSANE week (more to follow in another blog) and I have not had a second to breathe much less blog.

I really enjoyed our endeavor. The soul cleanse revolutionized my life in a few areas, refreshed my soul and refocused my spirit. I highly recommend embarking on a week long "diet" for your spiritual life. I think we would all reap different benefits from one but we would ALL reap benefits.

Quick wrap-up then... What I learned from my soul cleanse:

***(for Jami Lynn Kastner) the TV is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. I do not do moderation well in just about ANY area of my life, and TV is an area where I just should not even start.

***children learn best by example. You can't tell your kids to love Jesus. You can't lecture or Bible read your kids into loving Jesus. You have to love Jesus with ALL of yourself and let them SEE how to love Jesus.

***A lot of the time, healing is like peeling an onion. The healing happens in layers. God peels off layers of hurt one at a time, so each underneath layer can get prepped before hitting the harsh, cruel elements outside the onion. I like that type of healing. While I'm impatient for the healing to be "complete," I like that God is gentle with me when healing me.

***My husband is an fountain of spiritual wisdom. Every once and a while like a geyser he spews forth some of that wisdom and I am amazed at what showers all around me. I am glad my children have THIS daddy for many reasons but mostly because of the spiritual things he reveals to them.

***I love Jesus. I just do. I love Him always, completely and FOREVER.

Day 6... ONE thing

The more we do Family Worship; the more I hear my children walking around with a song on their lips. The more we pray together; the longer and more in-depth my children's prayers become. The more we read the Bible; the more they talk about what is in the Bible. Basically, the more God they get; the more God they want!

That is the ONE thing. Of course, I want my children to have a good education. Of course, I want my children to be healthy. Of course, I want my children to grow up to be successful human beings. But if I give them NOTHING in this world, but this ONE thing: a love for Jesus Christ. I am a success.

Which is actually very humbling and convicting to me..... Where is that ONE thing in my life? Is it left for last after all my busyness? Is it smushed into the beginning of my day before I get started with work, laundry, schooling, meal prep? If that ONE thing is most important in my life, then why doesn't it LOOK most important in my life? Why isn't every week the way the last one has been? Saturated with God... Focused above... Bathed in holiness....

I think that is the challenge moving forward. We have one last day of our soul cleanse. But it won't end there. I have to carry my clean soul with me every single day and KEEP IT CLEAN too. Alas, I digress into tomorrow's topic....

Day 5... Praise is NOT dependent upon our circumstances

The title of this blog seems a little more ominous then it really is. It is simply the thesis of the final prayer I prayed with the kids yesterday, and it is simply the lesson God taught all of us yesterday.

Yesterday was not a ridiculously difficult day. I was EXHAUSTED by the severe weather of the previous night. We had four storms role through Dodge County, and I FINALLY got what I wanted: a little SEVERE weather up in Dodge County! When I conversed with a friend at church (Dale Houghton insert your name here) about us moving to Dodge County last summer he said, "Isn't there always a tornado warning in Dodge County?" Then we moved here, and NOTHING, NADA, not a severe storm to be found. Well, I got my wish on Wednesday night. Only, as is the case with many things we wish for, I didn't realize the FULL ramifications of a night of severe weather. I was awake more than I was asleep on Wednesday night. First I was trying to calm four children terrified by a power outage. Then I was lying awake wondering if "this was a tornado" because the tree in my front yard looked like it was going to take wings and find another yard to reside in. During the third storm, I really truly thought the lightening was exploding in my front yard. So I was very, very, very tired yesterday. However, we had a fairly normal day. We did our summer school work. I worked. Laundry and dishes and chores were completed. Not much out of the ordinary occurred.

Well, as we have ANOTHER birthday approaching, there are party preparations to be made, and I had to get to Wal-Mart to get the supplies and some much needed groceries. (When your only option left is mayonnaise sandwiches you KNOW you gotta get to the store.) I thought a little bit about how this might put a crimp in Family Worship for tonight, but I had NO other option. I work all day and don't have time to go to Wal-Mart during the days. We waited until John was almost done working his second job so that he could shop with us. Somehow the Seventh Circle of Hell (shopping at Wal-Mart with four kids in tow) is a little more bearable with the daddy's help. The actual shopping wasn't THAT bad, although it didn't take more than 15 minutes for Hannah AND Elijah to be relegated to riding in the cart for bad behavior. (I do NOT know what it is about Wal-Mart! AHHHHHHH!) So we left Wal-Mart driving down 60, and we saw a cop stopping someone. I start driving a little more carefully and placed a quick warning call to John (who was behind me) that there was a cop. (I just KNOW that Cori thinks she knows exactly where this is going, but keep reading... I think you'll be surprised). I continued on and made the right turn onto P, but as I turned I took the turn a little too wide and crossed over the center line. A little bit down the road and flashing lights were in my rear view window. "Well, here it is," I thought. "My day of reckoning is here." I had been expecting it for quite some time. See I have been driving for longer then I care to admit with tail/brake lights that are possessed: sometimes they work/sometimes they don't. I know FULL WELL that they need to be fixed, but the estimate that the shop gave us is a little tough to swallow, and I'm just not sure where to fit that amount into our budget. So I just stopped driving unless I HAD to and tried to stay as close to home as possible. Well... that was all over now.

I have to take a quick rabbit trail to announce that (I'm sorry AIMEE! I know law enforcement is supposed to be near and dear to my heart BUT) I am NO fan of the Dodge County Sheriff's Office. NONE! And I am NOT kidding you it is ALWAYS the EXACT same officer causing me woe! Does he fricken follow the Kastners around? Since we moved to Dodge County (just one year) we have had more encounters with law enforcement (and all but 1 of them have been with this same officer) than we have in the entire rest of our marriage combined. Not-my-favorite officer, did take the time to point out that he only gave me a ticket for inattentive driving when he could have given me "crossing over the center line" which would cost me more points and more money. Well thank you so much kind sir. He also gave me 15 days to get my tail/brake light fixed. GREAT! because I'm sure I will be able to figure that out in 15 days when I haven't been able to figure it out in the 15 weeks (I'm estimating here but it's my blog so I can do that!) it's been manifesting the evil spirits. He also let slip that he was only "working overtime tonight because of the traffic initiative" they have going, which explained why John saw another THREE cops on the country roads leading home to our house. Whatever... there are SO many things I could say about my not so little ticket. I could defend myself by pointing out it is my first one in over seven years. Or I could admit how much it humbled me because I GRIPE CONTINUALLY at my husband about his poor driving habits. Or I could just be responsible and realize that I did something wrong and it was well within dude's rights to ticket me because of it. But this is not about any of those things.... it is about this:

I arrived home in not the best mood. It was already after 9 p.m. We had to put away hundreds of dollars in party supplies and groceries. The kids STILL hadn't even had dinner. I threw a frozen pizza in the oven and turned on the music and we PRAISED! We sang our VERY favorite song: Set me on Fire. We screamed it out! We danced about! We praised our Jesus!

Then before we consumed the frozen pizza that was to be our dinner, we prayed and I uttered the words that were the lesson of the day:

"God we praise You, not because we are in a good mood, not because the events of the last few hours were pleasing, but because You are worthy of PRAISE and Your praise does NOT depend upon our moods." I paused for a second, a catch in my throat, praying silently that my babies were GETTING THIS! "We praise You right now because You are good ALL the time."

I hope YOU are getting this too. Yesterday wasn't a HORRIBLE day. Yesterday had horrible parts. But no matter how horrible or how amazing my day (or your day) was, God remained the same. He was worthy of praise when I was standing on the side of Hwy P being eaten alive by mosquitoes and chastised by Deputy After-the-Kastners. He was worthy of praise when Hannah looked up at me and sighed, "I just LOVE you Momma." He was worthy of praise when my head was POUNDING from lack of sleep. He was worthy of praise when Noah got that averaging problem all by himself on the first try. See, praise is NOT dependent upon our circumstances. Praise is dependent upon Him... and He is good ALL the time!

Day 3... Epic Fail

Ugh! I was NOT a shining beacon of God's light today. Ugh.... This was a BAD day.

It all started because of the Kastner Family Homeschooling Doctrine. See our Statement of Faith on homeschooling does not include the words "Summer Break." From the Head Mistress's point of view, we do take a break in the summer because we only do reading and math. But the pupils of this Academy of Insanity do not see that as a break, and today they revolted over that fact. They whined their way through math, complained their way through flashcards, and gnashed their teeth through reading, and the teacher did NOT respond to the melee with grace.

I got frustrated. I was impatient. I muttered to myself, "THIS!?!?!? Is what I gave up my career for?!?!". It was not a banner day.

But even in an epic fail there is a lesson to be learned. Even in a major screw up there is value. By Family Worship time I had gotten control of my frustration and conviction had set in. We started with a lecture and then moved into a repentant spirit of worship. The first song had me on my knees bawling. I poured out my repentance to my God. By the time we closed in prayer, all hearts had repented and not many eyes were dry.

See sometimes a Momma has to teach her children what to do when they screw up, and oftentimes showing them what to do is better than telling them.

Day 2... Prayer Walk

Have you seen Facing the Giants? It is one of our FAVORITE movies. I haven't blogged about it in quite some time though. That movie just ROCKED my world and is the source of MANY good ideas, blogs, and resolutions for John and me. One of those ideas came to us in April 2009. Inspired by the man who walks the halls of the high school praying over each locker, John and I began walking the aisles at our church prior to Sunday service, and praying for a revival. Well today John spring boarded off his initial good idea and came up with another doozie!

Ever since leaving New Day Church, John and I have felt God calling us to take a break from service. At New Day, we were self-admittedly over-committed. It seemed we served in every ministry they had available: set-up, worship team, lunch-making, youth group, meals for those in need. After four years we were POOPED and really felt that God wanted us to abstain from getting involved in church ministry for awhile. However, anyone who knows us can probably imagine what a difficult pill that was for us to swallow. We are doers. We are servers. We are NOT ones to just sit there in warm a pew. However, that was exactly what God was asking us to do. I fought back a little, testing the limits my Heavenly parent had set and begged, "Isn't there ANYWHERE I can serve God? I feel so useless without service!" Quietly I felt Him answer, "Your neighborhood is going to be your mission field."

As a result John and I have made efforts to reach out to those in our little neighborhood. We have gotten to know a few people, and we have reached out a little through prayer and service. Well today God gave John an idea which flowed perfectly with this new commission God had given us. He said that, just like we used to walk the aisles of New Day Church and pray, we should start walking the streets of our neighborhood and pray. GENIUS! I LOVED it!

So we started tonight. Admittedly we only made it down "our" cul de sac and part of the adjacent one. The kids pooped out halfway back up our cul de sac. Initially I told them they could go inside while we walked/prayed the rest of the neighborhood, but just a short way down the second street, I started feeling very uncomfortable about walking while they were at home and out of my line of sight. So we did a blanket prayer over the last two streets and headed back home.

As we walked down our little street, we prayed for all our neighbors. For the ones we know, we prayed specifically. Our friends Mike and Rose were out in their garden, and John even walked up the drive and asked if he could pray for Rose. We have been holding them tight in our prayers for several months as Rose has suffered some medical struggles that even the Mayo Clinic has been unable to diagnose. (I would really appreciate it if you could pray for them too. Pain and sickness are so hard to bear but when it is undiagnosed the suffering is greatly increased.) (Yups Kristie we prayed for you and your little clan too as we passed by your abode). For the ones we've yet to meet, we prayed more generally. Regardless it was a GREAT inaugural Prayer Walk, and I look forward to making it a weekly occurrence.

An update on the rest of the Soul Cleanse:

We are doing GREAT so far. No TV. No talk radio. No secular music. This morning we arose at 5:30 a.m. and had our individual quiet time which ended with prayer together as a couple. Immediately after "wake up call" I read the Bible with Auntie Marge and the kids and we prayed. As a family we did our prayer walk and followed it with Family Worship. Right now, John is doing bedtime Bible reading and prayer with the kids while I blog (last night's blog kept me up WAY too late).

We are experiencing some breakthroughs, but on a few issues we are still pounding against the barriers praying that God will bring them tumbling down. An odd side effect that I really didn't think of or expect has been a RIDICULOUS increase in intimacy. The more frequently we pray, praise and read the Word together the more I see of my husband's heart, and I REALLY like what I see. I know we're only on day 2 here, but I SURE hope that we can keep a consistency to some of this.... especially in the area of prayer together. We've always kinda gone in fits and starts in this area, and I just keep thinking if this is how much we've grown and learned and reaped after just two days of GREATLY increased prayed time, what would 2 weeks bring us? or 2 months? or 2 years? We shall see I guess.

Okay everyone I gotta close this up. We still have intercessory prayer on our Soul Cleanse agenda for tonight and my eyelids are already drooping. Have a great night!