My mother loves me. This I know for sure. I have never ever doubted it. All of my life she has shown me her love. I am forty years old (okay fine ALMOST forty years old), yet my birthday is still a national holiday in her mind. I still get Easter baskets and St. Nick gifts from her. When she gives me a hug, she always does that extra tight squeeze and I can feel her thinking, “Mmmmm my baby.” Yes, I still am her baby.
So often I worry that I am failing my children. I am not teaching them how to clean up after themselves well enough. They live in a chaotic, crazy house. It is loud and disorganized and in a state of constant upheaval. I STINK at routines. I am great at making plans but HORRIBLE at following through with them. Were they stacked on end, the ways in which I am screwing up would reach to the moon.
But when I think back on my childhood, I realize that I don’t remember any of those things. I really don’t remember whether the house was clean or dirty. I do not really recall if my mother stuck to a schedule or not. I don’t remember learning to brush my teeth or tie my shoes or load the dishwasher. But I do remember that I was loved. I remember feeling important to my mother. I remember her sacrificing so I could have a swimming pool, take gymnastics and dance lessons, and go to a private school. I remember her popping popcorn with the top off on a rainy day and going down the curvy slide with us. I remember that every fiber of my being was loved with every fiber of my mom’s being. And it hits me….
It’s all about love, love, love, love, love…. Clean houses, mom’s with flat tummies, perfectly cooked meals… it is NOT about any of those things. A foundation of love is what a child needs. A child who grows up knowing to the core of his being he is loved is a lucky child. The mother who in spite of her own failings and shortcomings is able to convey this message to her child: you are loved. She is the successful mom.
My mom did at least one thing very, very, very right. She loved me, wholly, truly, completely and fully. She loved me. What a wonderful example for me to follow and what a wonderful gift she gave me.
Happy Mother’s Day Mom! I love you too.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13
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