Be careful little eyes what you see....

Do you remember singing this song as a child???

Be careful little eyes what you see.
Be careful little eyes what you see.
Cuz the Father up above is looking down in love so,
Be careful little eyes what you see.

Idk if "Be careful little mouth what you speak" was a real verse; however, it is the verse that has been ringing in my head lately.

See I've realized that these four gorgeous beings I gave birth to are like little TAPE RECORDERS. They parrot back the things I have said to them with STUNNING accuracy (now do they actually apply the ones like, "Close the fridge!" "Rinse your dishes." "Wash your hands." not so much...), but they hear and remember.... typically the things I either didn't know they were listening to or that I wish they hadn't heard.

This morning Jeremiah said to Elijah, "Lying is like slapping God in the face. Mom TOLD me that!"

I thought, That's actually good! but when in the WORLD did I say that???


Other occurrences as of late have just really been bringing to the forefront of my mind that the words I speak are powerful and I need to be CAREFUL how I wield them.

However, there's another verse to this song too....


Be careful little ears what you hear
Be careful little ears what you hear

Sometimes that verse is EASILY applied. Recently Hannah came around the corner singing lyrics to a Katy Perry song... the application of which COMPLETELY escaped her, but hearing those words from my innocent princess's mouth was JUST enough to get me to turn THAT song off next time it came on the radio (or on Glee).

Sometimes it is not so easy. This past summer, I've been REALLY forced to teach my children to be CAREFUL how they hear other people. Sometimes they get stuck in this mentality that says, "I know what he meant!" They are often running up to me and saying, "I know he MEANT to hurt me. I know he MEANT to say (or do) that." I have another saying for those times, "You cannot know another man's heart."

It is SO true. Often I think we take offense, make judgments, assume hurts when the other person NEVER, EVER in a million years meant the word or action the way we interpreted it. I am a FIRM believer in the fact that we are responsible not just for the words we say but for the delivery of those words as well. If I say something that hurts or offends someone, even if I did NOT intend it the way it was taken, I am RESPONSIBLE for the hurt I caused.  However, I also believe in what my sister and I call "assuming benevolent intent." My sister Jodi and I frequently converse about the fact that we are BOUND by Christ's blood to assume that someone did NOT mean anything mean, vicious or sinful with their words until we have confirmation FROM THE PERSON that they meant that. When we feel hurt, we aim to assume benevolent (good, painless, harm-free) intent.

I try hard to teach my children this by following up the, "You cannot know another person's heart." message by telling them it is their JOB as a Christian to assume the best in people. That is WHAT Jesus would do.

My challenge to you today is to pick up these glasses I am extending to you. They are glasses that view the world as NOT out to get them. They are glasses that ALWAYS assumes the best in people. They are glasses that view hurt as UNINTENTIONAL. They are glasses that protect your eyes from seeing faults and slights until it is CONFIRMED that they were intended. They are glasses that help you ASSUME BENEVOLENT INTENT.

These glasses aren't that easy to wear. This world is FULL of people who are self-centered, crass and even CRUEL. But I believe these glasses help us to see people (and situations) the way Christ wants us to see them. Because more often than not, when wearing them, I see that people are more guilty of thoughtlessly choosing words or mis-speaking than they are of lying, slandering or trying to hurt me.


Be careful little eyes what you see.
Be careful little eyes what you see.
Cuz the Father up above is looking down in love so,
Be careful little eyes what you see.


Now, I gotta run. I gotta put MY glasses back on and then go apologize to my hubby for looking at him this morning before I had them properly in place.

Love y'all!

Cleansing my soul....

This morning a friend's Facebook status (Sarah Bowling) caught my attention: it said, "I think ever so often we should consider doing a soul cleanse - just some food for thought." I immediately took this idea to my bff. "What do you think, Hon? Are you game?"

Together we started pondering the idea of a soul cleanse. We are SUCH huge fans of cleansing diets. While we never seem to make it all the way through one, we still believe deeply in the concept of cleansing toxins from one's body. So the idea of doing a cleanse for our souls really appealed to us.

We started thinking through what a cleansing diet involves: eliminating junk food and increasing healthy food.... the result of which is a cleansing of toxins from one's body. Then we marinated on how could we fashion a "cleansing diet" for our souls.

First we contemplated what things are junk food to our soul. Junk food in our diet isn't necessarily evil, but it does fill our bellies with food that does not bring much nutritive benefit to our bodies. There are things in our life that do the same thing to our spirits. They are not necessarily evil or sinful, in and of themselves, but they fill our time with stuff that does not bring much benefit to our spirit. We tried to identify what things in our life have little to no spiritual value. The list John and I came up with included: secular music, talk radio, and TV. We decided these things, while not "sin," are taking up space that could be filled with more spiritual pursuits.

Next we contemplated what is spiritual health food. What are the good things we should increase in our daily spiritual "diet" in order to eliminate spiritual toxins. We thought, "How can we get more God into our lives?" These spiritual "health foods" boiled down to three things: 1. Prayer 2. Reading the Word 3. Worship. We started thinking through our schedules and coming up with ways to get more and more of these three things into our lives.

One thing we change we have ABSOLUTELY got to make is: we have to get back to church! Car problems have kept us from traveling the 40 minutes to church for months now. We need a BIG repair to fix the problem and are not able to drive long distances right now. Today we spent some time searching for an "interim" church, and we found one just 15 minutes away! Even if it isn't the church where our hearts are, at least we will be at church. And who knows! Maybe God has plans for us at this "interim" church.

Another thing we are committing to: Family Worship. For a long time in the beginning of 2009, our family faithfully worshiped together on Friday nights. We would spend an hour or so, praising and worshiping, dancing and clapping, crying and praying. It was an AMAZING thing. However, somehow when the storms started we let that habit fall to the wayside. It is being revived again this week. In fact, this week we are going to try to do Family Worship EVERY SINGLE night! (Some of you BETTER keep me accountable and ask how many times we actually did it!) Then after our cleansing week ends, we plan to return to weekly Family Worship times.

It didn't take long as we were hatching these plans, for me to feel my stomach drop with the realization that Satan was NOT going to like this. I wanted to throw up, but yet I was not really deterred. See quick rewind back to 2009. John and I were ON FIRE for God! We were praying fervently and faithfully for a revival in our church. We were working hard to lead the youth of our church closer and closer to Christ. Using Facebook, I started a prayer group. I spent nearly every morning praying through long lists of requests, some from people I didn't even know personally. We might as well have been waving a red cape in front of a raging bull. John even posted on Facebook one day, "Bring it on Satan." Only we didn't fully realize how what we were doing was going to stir of the forces of the evil realm, and I don't think either of us had a healthy enough respect for what exactly Satan is capable of. So when Satan charged at us we didn't have our eyes on him, we weren't prepared for his attack. He blindsided us from what seemed like out of NOWHERE. He brought weapons to the fight that we didn't even know existed, and while he did not win (for he NEVER does) at the end of the battle John and I found ourselves face down in mud that was tinged with our own blood. Gravely but not fatally wounded, we found ourselves with a new appreciation for Satan's crafty power, a sickening realization of our frail, wicked humanity, and a triumphant assurance of His sovereignty, goodness, and never-ending, loving, kindness.

But this time I feel we will weather the battle better. I stopped the second I got that sick realization that we were about to HACK off the devil. I went to John, and we agreed in prayer, covering our entire family, our possessions, our relationship with the blood of Christ. I know we are about to make the devil a very unhappy camper, but this time we are ready for him. I don't want to fight him again. I don't relish the thought of battling him, especially since we really haven't even recovered from the last series of skirmishes. But I want MORE of God in my life. I want to know Him more deeply. I want to love Him more completely. I want to reflect Him more clearly. And if I have to fight to get that, so be it.

Last night we watched Independence Day. (I LOVE that movie! However, during our soul cleansing it will not be on the list of approved pursuits.) After an air battle with an alien which results in a crash, Will Smith opens the alien craft to find the alien inside is STILL alive. He punches the thing full in the face and knocks it unconscious. That scene inspired me! His character had just finished a grueling dogfight in which his best friend was killed. He was tired and weary yet when he saw the enemy was still writhing he rose to the challenge and knocked that alien OUT!

I too have been through a grueling battle. The past 12 months have been wrought with battles. My husband, my marriage, my family, my very life, and everything I hold dear have been threatened. I am tired and weary, but I tell you what, I am NOT going to go down without a fight! I am going to keep on taking swings at that crafty old snake, and I will crush him under my foot because I am a child of the King and MY SIDE WINS IN THE END! No matter how many stupid little battles Satan appears to have won along the way, in the end WE WIN!

So I am inspired and motivated, and I am girding up my loins for battle. But I am also reaching out my hands to my Father the King, expectantly and confidently waiting for Him to fill my begging hands with good and amazing things from above.

I'm going to do my best to chronicle this journey here daily. I will try as hard as I can to be as transparent as possible and let you all walk with us through this cleansing of our souls... I don't think it will be easy. I'm reminded of the vomiting that occurred the time I tried to begin my new year with a cleansing diet but the shock of caffeine withdrawal had me nauseated by the severe headache pain. I'm thinking that a spiritual cleansing might not be much more pleasant than that. However, I full, well believe that the benefits of cleansing my soul will FAR outweigh the benefits of any kind of cleansing of my physical body.

So here we go! Project soul cleansing begins when I wake up this morning. One week of eliminating spiritual junk food and increasing spiritual health food. I have made a list in my journal of "toxins" that I hope God will purge out of my soul and breakthroughs I hope He will bring. But I FULL WELL expect that at the end of this week, the list of actual toxins purged and actual breakthroughs made will far exceed my expectations and will be exceedingly more than anything I could ask for or hope for.

In the world not of it........

To wear words on one’s butt or not, that is the question that plagues me today. Really it is a much broader issue that is on my heart: where do we draw the line TODAY between acceptable and not acceptable for a Christian. The questions that sprout from this are infinitesimal including much more than wearing words across the rear end. For our family right now they include things like: should one be allowed to choose soccer practice over AWANA and should a boy be allowed to get his ears pierced. Your family may be dealing with different questions:

Should my child get a Facebook account?
What’s the right age for a child to get a cell phone? Wear makeup? Go on a date?
Can my child be emo and be a Christian?

They all boil down to this same thing: how much of the world should we be letting into our lives, into our children’s lives. I think that children/youth of this generation have it harder than any generation prior to them. Never before have there been SO many doorways of temptation which lead to sin available. Sexting, internet predators, pop-up porn ads, pharming, huffing, sex parties THESE are the things today’s children and youth are being bombarded with every single day. Back in the day, all I had to "say no" to was drinking, pot and sex. That was about it! Today the things kids have to say no to are so much harder.

Which leads me back to words on one's butt.... seriously what's the harm of a playful slogan or two across your rear end... "princess" or "sweetheart" that's tame enough right? Or what about showing support of your team with a well placed "Sabers!" or "2010"... But just because what's written there isn't sleazy doesn't make the words on the butt issue any less controversial. My husband has VOWED that Hannah will NOT wear any writing across her rump. He says that will just encourage boys to look at her butt and call attention to it. I'm not sure what I think or what we'll end up doing with that issue. In parenting John and I are called OVER and OVER again to deliberate the question, "Is THIS issue worth fighting with our child over?" So I don't know where we'll be when she's 13 or 15 or 17, but this I do know: The Bible is silent on this issue. It does not say, "Thou shalt not display slogans across thy derriere." Therefore, we are left to mull through the muddy waters of modesty by ourselves. I guess the only answer is that John & JamiKastner have to determine for OUR family what is right. No one else can make that choice for us. We are the parents given the responsibility for raising Hannah Elyzabeth Kastner. We are the ones who will be held accountable for how she is parented. Therefore, we have to make the decision of whether her rear-end will be allowed to become a billboard or not. I truly don't know what we'll decide. But I do know that what "other kids are doing" will not affect my decision, and it shouldn't affect yours either.

Wouldn't it be great if we all did this? If we stopped worrying about whether someone else listens to secular music or sports a tattoo or has a glass of wine with dinner? Last week in church our pastor said something I underlined, circled AND highlighted in my program, "That's between you and Jesus!" I agree with him wholeheartedly. I believe you need to get with your God and determine if that is the language He wants coming out of your mouth or if that is the establishment He wants you visiting. The rest of us need to get our noses out of your business and let you and God get down to the brass tacks of the matter.

When we hear an F-bomb fly out of someone's mouth, why is it that we assume the person who dropped it must not be a Christian or if they are a Christian they haven't learned to "tame their tongue." How would we feel if we learned that person who just let that cuss word fly had just received word their child has leukemia or had just found out their mother was killed in a tragic accident or had just gotten confirmation that their spouse was cheating on them. I'm not advocating being a potty mouth here, and I actually do think it is possible to remain Christlike even under the WORST of stress. But (and that's a BIG HUGE BUT there) I am advocating less turning up of noses and more trying to understand. I am telling you that even VERY godly people when pushed to the very edge of what they can tolerate may reveal an imperfection or two.

I love the saying, "Hate the sin. Love the sinner." I don't have to agree with your language to love you. I don't have to listen to the same kinda music as you do to love you. And I can love you (and your daughter) whether you wear words on your butt or not. Good luck everyone! Helping these babies navigate their way through the evil of this present world is a difficult job! I'm praying for all of you as you hash out the nitty gritty of these issues. God go with you!

The Aroma of Jesus

Last week I had a tooth extracted. Then a few days ago, I had to return to the dentist as my extraction site was bothering me. I thought the site was infected, but the dentist said it was not. He then packed the hole in my gum with medicated gauze because he suspected I had a dry socket. It was not a fun process. The packing was not comfortable, and the aroma and taste of the stuff he put in my gum was like nothing I have ever experienced before. I gagged over the taste dripping down my throat and immediately lost my ability to smell any other aroma. I returned home and immediately my smell announced my arrival. Noah said, “That is you? I thought the people came to spray the lawn!” Elise was standing behind my chair as I faced the TV and said goodbye to her. She said she could smell me when I was not even talking in her direction. John put his hand over his face every time I opened my mouth, and Elijah kept fanning his hand in front of his face in an attempt to shoo away my odor. At first I was just miserable with the over-powering aroma and taste driving me nuts. Now two days later, I have become a little accustomed to it, and I think it is actually wearing off a little too.

This made me think. Wouldn’t it be great if my love for Jesus permeated my life as much as the smell permeated my breath? Wouldn’t it be great if all I could smell and taste would be Him? If every time I opened my mouth, others were overwhelmed by the love of Jesus flowing out of me? If just by standing behind me, they were still surrounded by the love of God?

I thought about this and I wondered, how can I plant a little bit of medicated Jesus gauze in my heart to make this happen? And how do I avoid becoming accustomed to it and allowing it to wear off a little? I know this answer is basic. It is like Christianity 101. It has to be a daily thing. Every single solitary day I have to fill up on Jesus. I have to read the Word. I have to talk to Him. The more I pursue Him, the more He will pour out of me. The more I immerse myself in Him, the more I will smell like Him.

So if you want to smell like Jesus too, then quit reading this blog and go talk to Him! Open up His word. Spend some time basking in Him, and then go and spread the aroma of Jesus to all around you.