Tuesday, October 27, 2020

It is well...

We are standing at the beginning of a deep dark valley. We've actually been descending the backside of the mountain for several weeks. We could see the valley in the distance, so to some extent we could prepare for it. But we've arrived...  Set foot on the actual terrain of the valley last night just before bed.


We've traveled this kind of valley before. It was horrible. Painful. Exhausting. Even faith shaking. As I crawled into bed last night, I felt myself reverting to my old pattern of handling this. Every time I closed my eyes sheer terror overcame me, so I picked my phone back up to try to distract myself from the fiery darts racing through my mind. I think I finally escaped my consciousness just before midnight. I fell asleep whispering the lyrics of my new song.... 
 
You are good
In the morning I sing
You are good
In the evening I sing
You are good
You are good to me
 
I slept like the dead! Blissfully, no nightmares assailed. But when I woke I had that lingering wish I had slept longer feeling. I lifted my cement limbs from my bed and started my day. As I brewed my coffee, the Lord whispered to me. He reminded me how the last time I traveled this valley, I got to the end and glanced back wistfully wishing I had traveled stronger. I repeatedly told Him, "Not that I want another chance to do it better! But..." 

Alas... not my will but His be done... we are here again. And this time. Imma do it BETTER! So just some random reminders to myself... really just a packing list for the trip 

*don't travel alone! Bring your prayer tribe with you, Jami! (You know who you are... prepare to HEAR from me.)

*sing your way through the darkest parts (when sorrows like sea billows blow.... It. Is. Well.)

*cocoon yourself.... reserve your energy... don't overcommit... pull back into your cozy spot and STAY SAFE... surround yourself with love and hope and peace as much as it depends on you.

Here's the thing God spoke to me.... this is gonna happen. You're going to walk this valley. It's up to you whether you walk it with 10 pounds of sharp rocks on your back binge eating m&ms and hot cheetos chased down with espressos.... or if you set down the rocks. Hydrate. Eat whole, good foods. And follow your Guide to the other side.

My goal is the later.

Peace everyone! Have a great day.

For no word from God will ever fail.
Luke 1:37

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