A personal blog....

Sooooooooooooo.... I'm venturing into unchartered territory.... Attempting to walk with this tattered and tender Achilles tendon. I am proceeding slowly and with GREAT caution.  Just one lap down the cul de sac and if I feel pain, I am (almost always) turning back. My purpose is two-fold really:  workout AND break in these new shoes I got before my orthotic inserts arrive.

This morning as I walked God NAILED me to the wall with 2 songs from my music player.  It was INTENSE and personal and AMAZING... so of course I wanted to share it with you.

I'm not really a HUGE fan of promoting a strong self-image.  I really truly believe that when we focus on our self-image we take our eyes off Him for too long.  However, that being said I can EASILY identify the fact that I am WAY too hard on myself.  Seriously I am!  I am too fat... too busy... too unorganized... too impatient... too... too... too...  My mom recently said to me, "You are the most guilt-ridden person I know."  I can make just about anything my fault.  I bet I could make the Tsunami in Japan my fault if I tried hard enough.  So while I don't put much stock or time into building up my self-image, I recognize that I do need to ease up on myself a little.  

This morning the first song as I walked was Beautiful... Mercy Me; I love this song; it's made me cry many times before; but NOTHING like this morning before.... I literally almost fell to my knees with the power of it today.

Days will come when you don't have the strength 
[EVERY SINGLE DAY JUST ABOUT]
When all you hear is you're not worth anything
[seems that's all I hear]
Wondering if you ever could be loved
[or why I would be loved]
And if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much


You're beautiful
[really Father?  cuz I don't feel like it]
You're beautiful
[You're just SAYING that... you have to!  you're my Father]
You are made for so much more than all of this
[SHABAM!!!!]


He kept on speaking LOUD through this one lyric.  Every time I heard it in the song:  you're made for more than sleepless nights, stretching a dollar, squeezing into tight pants, your eyes bugging out of your head in frustration, tears pouring down your face in hopelessness... YOU ARE MADE FOR SO MUCH MORE THAN ALL OF THIS!

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are TREASURED, You are SACRED, You are HIS
You're beautiful


I'm praying that you have the heart to fight
Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
[you're fat... you're ugly... you're unlovable... you're emotional... you're overwhelmed...]
And they are nothing in the shadow of the cross
[NOTHING]

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
[me???]
Of all the earth and skies above
You're the one He madly loves
[me...]
Enough to die
[ME!!!!!]

You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than this
You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His

Over and over and over the words poured over my soul... Soothing me.... Healing me... Making me feel LOVED....

Soooooo not to leave you with a cliffhanger, but I just realized that this idea is TOO long for one blog... I will have to do part 2 tomorrow....

Just remember:

You are treasured

You are sacred

You are His